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Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Getting closer through babysteps & foods

I would like to share one particular experience on my parenting journey, related to meals & foods. After my second child was born, I hardly had time nor energy to do much. She would wake me for night feeds (yes I still breastfeed though she's already two-and-a-half now). Because of disrupted sleep & to take care of the young baby, my husband kindly took over morning routines of sending the older child (age 10 then) to school. Fortunately my son was also rather independent & sensible, waking up & settling his own breakfast everyday. 

At night, I would shoo him off to sleep when it's HIS bedtime, while I continue with my activities until it's MY bedtime.

With the baby in tow, I could hardly find time & energy to cook. My husband was very supportive and took over lunch preparation as well, before leaving for office. Dinner was usually eaten outside.

This went on for two-and-a-half years. My son is currently twelve years old and attending Primary Six. I don't really know what exactly triggered a change. Perhaps I was feeling a need to give my son moral support during his last semester of Primary School. Perhaps it was to let my husband sleep longer. Perhaps the baby girl has grown up enough to follow my schedule. Perhaps the previous months of building positive habits gave me the confidence to pull this off.

In fact, I only started with a simple decision to sleep & wake up earlier together with my son. Then I had to cook dinner so he could eat earlier & thus sleep earlier. Then it evolved into making effort to prepare varied breakfast foods for him each morning. Then I started to cook lunch too. Then because of waking early, I also found extra time for making some treats, like fruit milkshakes.

I never imagined I could do so much (I'm comparing with myself, I know many mums do much more than me). Guess it all started with building new positive habits. I did it in babysteps, focusing on one or two each month. After a few months, many things became "automatic". Thus when I decided to make another positive change in my life/ schedule, it was possible. I must give credit to Flylady and many other friends & resources. I'm also going to share this method with my kids. Oh, I mean the babysteps, not the foods, hahaha.

I feel my son is happier. I'm happier too. Not just because of the foods. But because I make the effort to provide support in whatever humble ways I know. Putting love in things I do for him. Cheering him up with little surprises. Showing him that he's important enough for me to make changes in my life.

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